Mom: Shawn! Stop licking the rug!
Me: Aw, it's because she's eating.
Mom: what?
Me: She has her bone, she's licking up particles!
Mom: Well, yeah. But she does it in our room too...
Me: That's because she's a lug ricker!
Mom: ...eh?
Me: I MEAN A RUG LICKER! A RUG LICKER~! *facepalm*