Urgh.

Oct. 4th, 2009 07:48 pm
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
Crowds + sunlight + being bored all day = cranky Heather who gets a migraine.

Stupid sunlight allergy.
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
So the pathetic-ness that I felt when I ate a can of beanless chili for lunch was immediately super ceded by how delicious it actually was. Hmmm...spicy Hormel beanless chili...

Well, I registered for unemployment today through the VEC. While I highly doubt that I won't get unemployment benefits (as the only way to not receive benefits is either a) don't do what the VEC demands, b) lie on your application, or c) gross misconduct as reason for your discharge). I have to admit, that even though I know it wasn't my abilities, or because of something that I wasn't doing, or anything like that, I still feel like a giant failure for having to subsist on unemployment even for a little while. But that's just pride talking. Especially since the medical bills for me (and now the ferrets) are going to be racking up this next month.

Also, I did not know how much work it took to remain on unemployment benefits! You have to reapply every week to receive the benefits (after determination is made) and you must show proof that you have been actively searching for a new job. I was also told to register for Job Services! And you have to personally contact two employers every week and record the results of said contacts! And you must keep those records for a year! In case they ever decide to audit you! A normal person, desperately searching for a job should be contacting at least five times that many! In a day! And you have to keep a record of them! For a year! ARGH.

My own sheer laziness will get me a new job because that's just way too much work to remain on unemployment. How do people cheat the system? (No, don't answer, I do actually know how, it wouldn't be that hard. But, still. They can't find a job/keep a job, why exactly?)
ikyrian: Naruto - Iruka (...buh?)
I had another dermatology appointment today at a brand new doctor's office - the Clinical Skin Center of Northern Virgina with Dr. Michael Stashower. They had me strip down to my undies, made me put on a paper gown and sit in a room for almost fifteen minutes by myself. When he came in for the exam it was pretty much the same song and dance (except for the part where he pulled down the paper gown to expose my breasts for the exam. That was weird. At least he was professional about it? I guess?). Y'know - take better care of your skin, seriously, you use Irish Spring, seriously?, get rid of the ferrets, yadda yadda yadda.

The big thing that came out of this exam is...you guys know that red spot on my chest, right between the two clavicle bones? He took one look at that and told me to get an appointment with an Ear, Nose, and Throat specialist posthaste. Apparently it's a congenital defect that could lead to thyroglossal ducts/cycts, bronchogenical cysts, sinus cysts, and/or cancer.

Me - AH-Buh-wah?

I did a little bit of research and it's apparently something that doesn't usually get diagnosed until later in life because most general practitioners wouldn't know to look for it. If I hadn't had a weird skin problem, it would have been much later until a doctor would have thought to even think it was a concern. So...yay for the disease weasel's giving me a pox?

He told me it probably wasn't going to turn out to be any sort of problem, but that it was best to get it imaged, preferably by a CAT scan. So now I have to go to my primary care physician to get a referral to see a ENT specialist. Which is another sixty bucks ($20 to see PCP, $40 for specialists. I thought HMO's were supposed to be CHEAPER?) for medical care.


I caught a bit of Michael Moore's documentary "Bowling for Columbine" today. I think I've seen some of it before, but I didn't see this part. Most of you probably know this, but for those of you who don't, BoC follows the "history" of gun violence in the US. While I was watching it, and Travis happened to be sitting on the couch playing his PSP, I had a moment of Zen a la The Daily Show.

I was watching the part where Michael Moore was interviewing a couple of people in the media industry, if you want to call it that, about how gun stories are the more provocative and sensational and higher rated stories then say, pollution. That it's easier to sell people on the violence of the guns and their consequences.

He asked one reporter, "If you had a choice between a half-drowned baby and a gun story, which would you go for?" And the reporter replies, "The gun story. Every time."

Then he goes on to interview a top exec producer for COPS and World's Most Violent/Extreme/Whatever Police Chases. And there they both discuss the evils of producing works that glorify the rage, violence, and whatnot of guns and the destruction it brings to people's lives vs trying to teach people how to stop spreading that kind of violence and how to solve the problem.

They came to the conclusion that the violent/bloody stuff sells better and it's too hard to get people to watch the other stuff. Which, no kidding, is a no duh.

My moment of Zen was this: I was watching a show where the parts that I had seen were glorifying violent crimes to sell the documentary to a wider audience while preaching that it would be infinitely better to try to teach people how to solve the problem without offering any sort of solution!

I think my brain broke, just a little. And while musing on this aloud, I hear this odd noise, like air leaking from a tire. I looked at Travis, where he is concentrating fiercely on his game.

"Shh," he whispered. "Stop making sense."

"But--"

"They don't like it when you make sense."

After that I just had to change the channel (to The Daily Show, ironically, where I saw the hysterical bit about who should be Obama's running mate).
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Bitch please)
I don't know how many of you follow my drama with allergies, but I have one more to add to the list. Since I'm having trouble remembering them all, I need to write them down. So things that I am allergic to are as follows:

Food
Mint
Eggs
Artificial Sweetener
Tomatoes (according to the allergist, I've never had a reaction to them...)
Shellfish
Some ingredient in dark colas (probably the color)

Animals
Dustmites
Cockroaches
Ferrets

Misc.
Sunlight

Please note that these are not in any sort of order as I'm way more allergic to shellfish than I am to tomatoes. Also the different categories produce a different allergic response. The food category, since it is ingested, produces the more life threatening swelling of the lips, mouth, throat (in that order), followed by hives on the arms and swelling of the legs. The animals can produce those if found in large quantities/long exposure to, but are more likely to aggravate my atopic eczema and dyshidrotic eczema. The sunlight allergy just produces a small papular extremely itchy rash on the exposed areas (arms, neck, chest, legs, etc.).

The eggs I just learned about last night from the damn cole slaw. It is also what prompted me to make a list so I know to avoid them in the future.
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Satoshi)
Oh I'm so going to regret this, but the Coke with lime slices was damn tasty. Actually, I think my body is already regretting it.
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
So! I finally did it - I joined the Manassas Community Chorale for their 2007-2008 season. Well, sort of. I still have to audition, which is tomorrow night, but I'm sure I'll be fine. Even if I am audition with the Star Spangled Banner. (Oh, so not my choice, but since I don't think I could learn a show tune in a week, it's all I got.) But I went to my first rehersal yesterday, and it was a blast! We're doing a show called "Thanks for the Memory" and it's all show tunes like "All Aboard!", "Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man" and "Don't Sit Under the Apple Tree".First concert is in October. One of the concerts is at the Bruton Parish Church in Williamsburg. I'm really excited about that one.

This is my first time ever singing in a SATB chorale. The first time the basses hit a truly low note, I shivered. It's also the first time I've ever sung in a chorale this size - up to 80 people! And everyone that I've spoken to has been very nice.

ANYWAY - I FINALLY have an answer to my skin problems. It is allergies. But not to the ferrets (yes!). I'm allergic to shellfish (SUSHI, NOOO!!), artificial sweetener (COKE ZERO! NOOOO!), dustmites, and cockroaches. The moment I stopped eating sushi, crab meat, shrimp, scallops, calamari, you know, all the GOOD stuff from the sea, and stopped drinking Coke Zero and chewing sugarless gum and well, all diet soda really, the swelling and the horrific rash went away. IN LESS THAN A WEEK. I still have bouts when I forget about the newfound allergies and go out and get some Korean sushi (that was very very odd...) or eat some calamari the hives come back. Stress causes the hand eczema.

In fact, last night was a little get together to welcome new members to the MCC. There were some brownies and these really tasy chocolate chip/peanut butter cookies. And I had a few because I didn't get dinner that night. This morning I woke up swollen and my hands had new vesicles which tells me that one of them probably had Splenda in it. Lovely. I guess I can never trust a bake sale again. T.T Nor a sushi bar. Wah.

I'm also currently living at my aunt's house. Technically I'm house/cat sitting, but really, I'm enjoying the freedom of living on my own. Throw in the ferrets and it'd be a grand ol' time. It's really time to move on from where I live now and seek out greener pastures. Can't go too far, tho' cuz I just plunked 63 in the MCC so I should at least stay the year.

Still considering going back to school. But it took me a year to decide to join MCC so I figure it'll take me at least that long if not longer to figure out what I REALLY want to do. My current field is HR and I have to admit, I'm not really loving it. Practically speaking, I wouldn't mind going into real estate, but again, practically speaking, with the down turn in real estate this isn't the time (or the place) to be trying that sort of thing out. Be nice just to get a better paying job so that I could start making a dent in my student loans instead of just barely making the minimum (oh, hey, that reminds me...). My dream would be to go back to school for art and combine my mad history skills and not so mad art skills (it's something that I really need to work on) and draw stories for a living. First I think I should start taking art classes, especially anatomy. I suck at that like whoa.

But the real estate thing comes out of my love and true desire to own an old Victorian with a turret and a wrap around porch. The ones I remember best, and there are a few around here, there's one that I would kill to have (mostly to get the money to afford it, heh) and fix up, but the ones I remember best are up in New York. I loved driving passed those houses and wondering why we didn't live there. The answer to that question is all to obvious (uh, poor. And - Army brat). And watching a lot of real estate shows with my aunt. Seriously though, I think that would be an interesting and rewarding career. And I don't just mean financially, but personally. Helping people find their dream homes. Helping new families start out in a new house. Am I romanticizing it? Hell, yeah. Would I be nervous as hell all the time because I'm shyie-mc-shying-ton? A no brainer. But still something that I would dearly love to get my hand in. Don't quite know how to do it, but I would love to learn how to try.

But, as Denise may remember, my wishes and wants change like a cross dresser on speed, so who knows what I'll want in six months? I'm all kinds of crazy like that.
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
So what i haven't actually mentioned here yet is that I haven't been to work since Monday. On Monday two co-workers took one look at me and was all, "ZOMG! YOU! ER! NOW!" And I was, "Oh, no, I'm fine! Srsly!" And then burst into tears which destroyed any argument. I managed to talk them down and M. took me to see the nurse practioner and M.'s comment on that was, "I've never seen anyone want to leave a room so fast." And then we went back to work and I spent a pretty miserable day there.

NP prescribed steriods, again. Since I had a derm. appointment on Thurs., at the time I figured I could make it four days.

I did't go to work on Tuesday. I woke up with my lips and eyes swollen like Monday only it was worse. So I stayed home and took 75 milligrams of Bendadryl every four hours along with 400 milligrams of Ibuprofen. (Oh yeah, I was really hyped up on the meds on Tuesday.) The only problem was, I broke out into a secondary rash (small, papular rash that covered all the areas that the eczema doesn't including some areas that it does). I freaked thinking it was a staph infection (not uncommon with wet eczema which I was experiencing) called the advice nurse and she was said, "You can go to urgent care, or you can see Dr. K. tomorrow."

Well, you all know me, I decide not to go to urgent care (but I was really, really close to choosing that option) and made an appointment with Dr. K. and had Dad drive me there. She prescribed that I start taking the damn steriods (I actually was going to go get them the day before, but I felt so shitty I didn't really want to move), along with two generic pepcid for the anti histamine effect along with another anti-histamine for the itching. She also gave me a doctor's note that excused me from work until Monday. I argued with her, saying that I'd probably feel better by Friday and said, We can always change the note, but I sincerely doubt you'll fell better by then.

So I go home, take all the drugs and fall asleep on the couch again. (BTW I've been sleeping on the couch for the past two days.) By evening, I feel better, not great, but better. I fall asleep on the couch that evening, and am rather excited to go to the dermatologists tomorrow.

Well, you all know what happened with that.

Right, I'm feeling pretty good. In terms of the rash and the swelling. (My lower legs, esp. my right one, have been swollen for a really long time, ever since I noticed the swelling in my ankle from my trip down to The Beach, it's come and gone. My legs finally look leg shaped again.) My ear hurts like hell and my stomache is upset at me at the moment, but other than that I feel fine.

I guess I'll clean my room *now* while I'm so hyped up on steriods I probably won't feel anything.
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
I'm so furious right now I could spit. Someone at Kaiser canceled my dermatology appointment WITHOUT TELLING ME and then claimed it was MY FAULT. UM, HELLO? I'm fucking miserable, why the hell would I cancel my appointment? And THEN tried to fob me off on the nurse practitioner. Uh, NO that's not happening. I only found out today, because I was trying to confirm my appointment. *RAGE RAGE RAGE*

UPDATE: Ok, got back from the appointment with the nurse practitioner (who was very nice and listened to me and was just generally wonderful, first experience I've ever had with Kaiser staff that was pleasant and helpful) and Dr. L came in and all three of us discussed my options. They took some of my skin to biopsy (and boy what that weird to watch) to make absolutely sure that this is an allergic reation. Then we're going to see about doing a RAST test in Allergy and if Dr. V can't do it (he's the Doc I saw when I got my scratch test done where I found I'm allergic to dust mites and cockroaches) then they're fobbing me off to Johns-Hopkins for even more advanced testing.

But it really might come down to I'm just horrifically allergic to ferrets and that means I'd have to think really seriously about giving them up. Which I completely, totally don't want to do. I love the little guys and would miss them terribly. I mean, if it was just a head, nose, throat, upper respiratory allergy, then I'd say, "Bring on the medications, bitches!" Because they make a lot of medicines for that. Almost no allergy medicines, from what I've been told and what I've researched myself, have any effect on skin allergies. And I can't be on steroids for long periods because I could box my liver and kidneys and then where would I be? No where, absolutely no where.
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
Dear Body,

It would be ever so helpful and kind of you to stop negatively reacting to everything new that comes along. This is no way to make friends with foreign substances. I must ask that you cease and desist on this course that you have been taking for the last nine months. If you continue on like this, I'm just going to have to cut you out of my will, and then where will you be? HUH? HUH?

♥♥♥,
Me
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (hmmm....)
I woke up this morning feeling like someone had punched me in the left kidney. Now, as I am not in the habit of going to bars, much less getting into bar fights, I couldn't fathom why this could be. It faded a little bit after awhile, but throbbed gently through most of the day.

Also, my hands shook quite violently from about 11-1 which is the point when I managed to finally get something to eat. The jittery feeling still hasn't left, really.

But enough about my general (un)health. I recently read a novel called Darcy's Story (about, who else?, Fitzwilliam Darcy from Pride and Prejudice) which was quite good and intriguing all the way up until the very end when they started confessing to each other. After that point it just generally got teeth grindingly irritating and I had to put it down probably never to be picked up again. Unless I decide to read the last chapter, of course. Missing all of the annoying lovey-dovey, smoopy, fluff that killed my enjoyment of it, of course. Liz and Fitz are a far more interesting couple when they hate each other. Or when Fitz is being all Emo!Fitz.

I'm slowly dipping my toes back into the ocean of books and I'm glad I have historical fiction to ease myself back in. There was a list of HistFic at the back of Darcy's Story that was really intriguing. On it was a novel told in the POV of the Jane Eyre's charge while she was working with...damn, the name's escaping me. It'll come to me eventually. I'm really excited to find that one as Jane Eyre is one of my favorite novels of all time, hands down. Rochester! That was his name...now what what the girl's name? Madeline? Hmm...All I remember was that it was French.

Anyway, yes. I'm slowly getting back into the habit of devouring every book in sight. I'm planning on making a book run soon, as my last book run only produced d.Gray-Man vol...5? 4? The newest one! Pride and Prejudice (which I still can't get through, but I promise you I will! Someday! maybe?) and Darcy's Story. With Father's Day coming up, I'm sure that I'll make it to a bookstore.

Nothing too terribly exciting going on here at the moment. Well, the thunderstorm was quite thrilling and I have missed them terribly. I love this time of year for precisely this reason: awesome thunderstorms. I'm really glad I didn't have to drive in it though, because that would've sucked. It's supposed to storm again tomorrow night, so maybe I'll sit outside and watch.

Come to think of it, I haven't seen any lightening bugs in the trees yet. Have they come out? I wonder...this year I'm going to take a picture of them twinkling in the trees like Earth born starlight.

EDIT: Got a response from my Dr. K about the hand shaking - hypoglycemic episodes - need to have regular and frequent meals. How come this is only starting now?

Skin update

Jun. 7th, 2007 09:05 pm
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
Well, I went to the allergist. There wasn't much help in that corner (couldn't even score a RX allergy pill and I actually asked for it! Shocking, I know.)...did say that the timing was suspicious (because it started up when I got the little guys), tho'. So that prompted the move of VnB from my room to the dining room. They did not take it well, at all. They moped the first day, and because I kept my door shut (no use in tempting fate, I know), they would scratch forlornly at the door. It was really pathetic in a really, really adorabibble way. I luff them so much. :D

Anyway, things have been pretty busy here. J.J. graduates from elementary to middle school on Wednesday, which will be fun. I missed D.D.'s induction into the JNHS because Auntie had the wrong time, so I hope I get to make it to this one.

Work has been a killer, but at least I've been busy instead of being bored, which is a good thing. Of course, part of the busy work is getting all of the term'd employee files into E2K which is frightfully and mind numbingly dull. But I rediscovered my Our Lady Peace CD's because of it, so I guess I can't complain about it that much. (Oh, who the hell am I kidding? IT BORING. SRSLY. I get to complain.) And I get to destroy all of the files over 7 years old, so it's been cool, sort of. It's been taking me a long while to get through it, mostly because I like to read the files before I put them away. I'm nosy like that - I guess in this case it's a good thing, because the E2K files really need to be updated. After I get done with the term'd employees, I guess I'll turn to the current employees to make sure their E2K files are up to date. I know I'm making more work for myself, but I think it will really help M. out in the future.

I'm once again seriously thinking about doing the motorcycle course and learning how to drive the damn thing. I already have the helmet, dammit, I should use it so it won't be a freaking waste of money! Maybe I can surprise my dad with it and we can finally go on that trip we've been thinking about. I know I'm a flake, but I really don't want to flake out on this.

I've also been thinking of going back to school, this time for the art degree that I wanted before. There's an open house soon at one of the Art Institute campuses that I think I should check out. Just to see. Maybe. <.< >.> We'll see. I really need something fun to do.
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
I got my allergist appointment moved up from July 6 to tomorrow with a bit of judicious crying into the phone...it was mostly from not being able to pull my right arm straight without wanting to scream in agony because the skin of my inner elbow was so cracked and raw. Among other things.

...like hormones, a coworker turning to another saying, "Remind me to bring my epipen tomorrow..." after noticing that my face was swollen, for walking around for two days like a cripple unable to use her arms, for just WANTING SOMEONE TO GIVE A SHIT.

I seriously hope this guy does. I despair at being like this for much longer without any real medical help beyond the "Let's try this...no better? And this? No? Well, I can't help you, sorry..." kind.
ikyrian: HiNaBN's {...} (Default)
I'd love to be writing about my exciting weekend with Karlene and Jessie, which was fun and awesome(♥), but all I can think about is my skin.

I don't know what the hell happened, but somehow for the four days I took away from my house my skin situation has deteriorated. I once again look like I've been crying for the past three week, my ankle is still very swollen (indeed, my right lower leg looks a bit swollen now too), the skin on my arms has exploded in fiery red patches of pus producing OUCH that I have never had with this problem.

I'm going to the nurse practitioner (AGAIN, THIRD TIME, HAS NEVER BEEN HELPFUL EVER) this morning, because my mom took one look at my oozing, open wounds and yelped, "You're going to call the doctor NOW young lady." I'll be making another call this week to see my dermatologist.

I can't determine what could have caused this, except for maybe all of the sun I got this weekend.

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